[Finally writing about him.]
[2012-10-22] @ [3:41 p.m.]
I want to write about this guy before the memories completely erase in my mind. We met on an online dating site, something I thought I'd never do (I did a lot of things I would never normally do). We unofficially met at the Dubliner on a Friday night. I passively said that I was meeting friends there. I never expected you to go. I was a little upset at first. I didn't even know you, and yet you want to meet me and hang out with my friends? I met you and politely introduced you to them. At least one of my friends showed some interest in who you were. She wanted to see your chest to figure out how hairy you were. I know you were embarrassed but you showed her anyways. I'm pretty sure she was drunk (or was that the month that they found out they were pregnant?).The following Tuesday I invited you to karaoke at a bar with a few other friends. This time it was a smaller group. We got to talk more. I thought you would have a different voice. But you were very nice and you liked my singing. But I don't fall in love with every guy that says they love my singing.
It's been seven or eight months since we met. You still like to buy me things I don't ask for. I say I don't like it when you spend money on me, but you know I do like it. I'm just not used to it. I also don't want you to buy me something I'd have to return later. Is it bad for me to consider the option that we might not stay together?
The last serious relationship I had really made me question if I was in love with the guy, or was I just in love with being in love. I still feel sorry for what happened. I don't really know how it got to that point. Maybe we never took love seriously and we never talked about our thoughts.
He said he was in love. Did we ever really know love? I don't want to settle for something that looks like love.
~ silverluna